Some time ago, I met someone on MATCH.COM. He was one of the most amazing people I've ever known until... 1. he started telling me the same stories, he told me when we met, over and over again... 2. when I'd asked him where he was or who he was with on certain days, the names and places changed almost every time and he would become very defensive... 3. he used to answer all my calls, then stopped answering and returned my calls hours later or text instead... 4. he always had somewhere to go and friends to see, yet he said since he started dating me, his friends never see him anymore and he didn't want to lose his friends.
After a while I decided to do a little research and found he was still on the dating website where we met, showing as "ONLINE NOW"! I confronted him... he removed the profile. Another time I walked in on him while he was on ADULT FRIEND FINDERS, which he said he was deleting as I walked in.... it's a website, not for dating, but for SEX... NO STRINGS ATTACHED??? Then I found emails in his sent box replying to someone on CRAIGSLIST CASUAL ENCOUNTERS... another sex site!!!! I've spoken to several women I found on his MYSPACE and FACEBOOK profiles who claim to have been with him, intimately, within the year we've been together... he said they were some CRAZY women he met online but was NEVER with them WHILE we were dating.
We've had many disputes over lying, cheating, and jealousy and each time he sucked me back in by playing mind games with me. He is gorgeous, charming, very sexual, witty, non confrontational, beyond intelligent, goes out of his way to help others and has a BA in PSYCHOLOGY!!! I believe he can make anyone believe anything!!!
After a year of being together, I don't know what is real anymore... I've tried to end it several times but he kept sucking me back in by turning it around on me, making ME feel guilty for suspecting that he, of all people, could do such a thing. He also said, no one he has ever dated, made him feel so bad about himself, the way I do... Once I was guilt ridden and we've made up, he'd bend over backwards to make me happy.... then do it ALL again.
When we met he made me feel safe and secure, I poured my heart out to him and showed him my weaknesses... because I am jealous by nature he says I've got a problem and I've created these situations myself. I know that is NOT possible because I've seen emails, talked to other women and seen him online... I know he is a liar, cheater, and master of manipulation yet I keep giving in... I know the need I have, to be with him, was created by him with all his head games, lessons, positive reinforcement, and guilt trips. I feel brainwashed and don't know how to free myself!!! If anyone has had similar experiences and can help please reply.
playersgirl... NC