Hi all,
I just happened upon this dating discussion site today, and of course I can't sit here and read without joining in. I think only one of the above posters really understands eharmony. It's for people who want a permanent relationship (remember that it was founded by a man who happens to be a devout Christian!) and who don't like sifting through hundreds of profiles themselves. It's more along the lines of the computer dating systems that came into being in the late 1960s and not at all similar to Match.com or Yahoo Personals, where YOU display your creativity (or lack thereof) in the profile your write, and then you search for someone who appeals to you. I belonged to the two above-mentioned dating services for about seven months a couple of years ago. Personally, I sort of enjoy creating an interesting, appealing profile to post. And I did find some dates, eventually meeting a guy whom I was with for over a year (via Yahoo). BTW, I am over 55, and am very selective in who I date.
A few months ago, I joined eharmony. Why? I realized that I DO want a permanent relationship, and saw that it was not in the works with my previous boyfriend. So I thought I'd try eH and see what happened. I immediately received quite a number of "matches," probably because a lot fo men had joined when I did, because of the special 3-month membership rate! Eharmony seems to have changed a bit since some of the earlier posts on this discussion, BTW, so my comments may sound at odds with some things that have been mentioned before. I noticed that a lot of men "closed" on me before any contact; likewise, I sometimes "closed" on them without contact. Why? Well, even though eharmony matches people up based on the personality inventory, there is also a place to write some personal comments. I'll call this the profile area. In my profile area, I emphasized that I am tall (5'11") and not really interested in men under 5'9". I also added that I don't care to meet any hunters or NRA members and furthermore, I hate motorcycles. So I expect quite a few men decided to withdraw from competition upon reading my profile! Furthermore, since I am SERIOUS about meeting The Love of My Life, I put my geographical range as the entire world! To my disappointment, I haven't actually received any overseas matches, but some men in other states may have decided that they didn't want to look so far afield.
You are required to choose a reason for "closing" on a match, but the choices are pointless and not enlightening: "I have decided to take a break from dating"; "Based on information in this person's profile, I am not interested."
I have actually been pleased at the caliber of men "matched" to me. Most seem intelligent, educated, share my political leanings, sound quite nice. However,I have contacted only two men so far. (Told you I am choosy!) One chatted with me on the phone a couple of times, then "ghosted." Well, I think he chickened out of dating at all. Some men do. The other is quite nice, except I found out he lied about his age. He claims that a friend told him "Everyone does it." Well, taking off a year or two is one thing, but he took off ten!! Nevertheless, this has nothing to do with eharmony. Men can lie about their age, their income, and, umm, other things, wherever you meet them.
I think the person who likes eharmony will NOT be a young person impatient to get lots of dates, but a mature person willing to look carefully at the possibilities, or the person who likes the pre-screening of personalities that eharmony does.
Marigold